today... sunday morning 1.20am... i really have a bad day.... my parent quarrel again. this time... i really have nothing to say... i see until i numb... i am so numb wiht it... house gone, family gone... As a brother, i really scared for my brother and my sister future. They are only 16 and 14 respectivity... Now they are waching television as nothing had happen... but i know in their heart, they ar confused, bother by this whole incident...
This time no weapon is used... no violence... the feeling between them are cold and numb... there is only distrust between them... If ur parent quarrel, they will shout at each other, it is a good sigh, some time a tight slap across the face is a bit overboard, or knife used (this one need police to come)... For my case, they are behaving as they are strangers just met in this particular place and one of them 'taken" another people money.... After a marriage lasted 19 year, this is the end... from a loving couple to a total stranger where scars of distrust, betray, bad blood between them finally appearing in front of my eye... People.... if u come from broken home, u will know the situation. Now everyone have a happy family (no wonder divorse rate in Singapre is so high, one out of three family is broken family
As i am tying this blog now... my father is in front of me... breathing deeply... sighing... thinking... "how am i going to survive? am i going to let this situation control by this crazy woman in this house?". Although he tried to cover this mask by talking about the thaliand movie we are watching now... but i know... it is impossible... his face cannot express laugher and sadness although he was thinking of expressing both in his face, giving out errie laugher in his fierce face, saying" what can she do?", twice... the whole face frown now as he was watching the advertisment.... he try to control himself.... trying to act as a "good" guy in front of us. He now sitting behind me... looking at the television... murmuring "she cannot manage all three of us"
How i wish this month of August fly .... cause by the end of the month, this sad place will be sold and i looking forward to the new home.... i hate my eighteen birthday....
